If you live every day, you will put yourself in a variety of group life, such as company and mom relationships, friendships, neighborhood relationships, etc. I like to interact with people, but when it comes to groups and groups, don't you worry if you don't get used to things like "I can't blend in well with my surroundings" or "I feel the temperature difference with everyone"?
If you're worried, say, "You don't have to try to blend in well." Regardless of whether you have many friends or not, it's good if there are some people you can take good care of. With that in mind, I would like to introduce "tips on how to build human relations that do not overdo it".
Three reasons to worry
1. I'm too conscious of the feelings of the people around me.
Are you too conscious of the feelings of the people around you and the other person rather than your own feelings? It is a tendency that is common in the type of person who is considerate and kind. However, if you adapt too much to the other party, your feelings tend to get lost.
"What do I want to do?" "Are you enjoying being with everyone?" "Aren't you overdoing it?" Please always ask.
You can check your feelings and it will be a priority practice.
Let's aim for our own first.
2. If you're not the same as everyone else, you'll feel uneasy.
If you are among a large number of people, such as "If you are different from everyone else, you won't be left out of the group" or "You might think you're out of the way," you'll definitely value cooperation. It's by no means a bad thing. But if you don't mind, your feelings and time will be exhausted, and it will cause you to get tired.
You don't have to be tied to being "the same as everyone else." You have the freedom to choose whether you are alone or with everyone or cozy!
3. I'll try to adapt to people.
I have a different opinion from myself and other people. It is natural to be different, and let's think lucky if it fits. Then, it does not adapt to the other party more than necessary, and it becomes very comfortable. If you are a natural person, people who are on the same wavelength will gather.
【By Scene】Tips on how to build comfortable human relations
1. Think of the company as a human relationship and what you've been given
You can't choose your company's relationships, and there are many things that bother you because it's every day. Let's divide this place and think that it is "the one given". It is a chance that you can grow even those who are not good at it, and with a little ingenuity and action, the scenery in front of you will surely change☆
Call your name and then start the conversation
When people call their names, they feel relieved that they are accepted. Let's start greeting and conversation after calling the other person's name, "Thank you, O-san."
As you continue, you will notice that the sense of distance between you and your opponent is shrinking. It's also a chance to get your name called.
arrive at the office ten minutes earlier than usual
Arriving at the office 10 minutes earlier than usual gives you peace of mind. You may have a conversation with someone you haven't talked to before in the changing room or in the hot water supply room. First of all, let's talk to "Greetings only" and lower the hurdle. If communication is born by sending your own communication, you will gain confidence, so please give it a try. The relaxation of feelings is an opportunity to take a step forward.
2. Set up mom's relationships and my rules
Socializing with moms who connect through their children. Let's think about what you can do and "My Rule" which does not become tired. It is recommended because it does not get lost if it decides, and the burden of the heart decreases.
"What should I call you?" Let's ask their names.
When you call each other's names, you will feel a sense of intimacy at once and the distance will be reduced. This is a real experience where I was actually raising a child and my relationship with my mom's friend became smooth.
First of all, to the person who wants to "get along" to the person who wants to "get along", in the flow of the conversation, "Should I call your name?" Just ask! It will be an opportunity for the other party to know how to call your name♪
The standing talk is decided to the standard of ten minutes.
It's a good time to chat with a mom you bump into at a child's pick-up and drop-off. It can also be used to exchange information and change your mind. But if it gets too long, to be honest, you may feel depressed. Let's set a standard of standing talk for 10 minutes♪ you can end the conversation smartly by telling them that you can chat for only 10 minutes first.
I don't agree with gossip or abuse.
One of the disadvantages of a long-standing story is that the topic tends to shift to gossip and abuse. It's hard to say different opinions even if you don't think about it. In such a case, let's leave the place as soon as possible without agreeing only to the listener.
Don't worry about being told behind your back. You should think that you didn't have anything to do with them.
3. Choose people who can make friends and socialize on an equal footing
It is a friendship to be able, to be honest oneself in the interpersonal relationship. "I like it", "I like it", "I want to know more", "It's fun to be with you", "I feel relieved", etc. It's nice to be able to forgive each other and get along on an equal footing.
Don't try to make yourself look good
It's natural to want to be liked, but I don't recommend trying too hard to make yourself look better than necessary. The relationships you work hard to make are exhausting and exhausting yourself. And I'm many times happier if you like yourself in a natural way. You are enough as it is.
A good listener is pleased.
When you're in a group, you feel like you can't get used to it, and you've felt uncomfortable being there, don't you think everyone has ever felt uncomfortable? You don't have to force yourself to go out with them, but once you join a group, it's hard to get out of it.
All you have to do is have one friend who can forgive you.
If a lot of people get together, it is natural that there are various ways of feeling and ways of thinking, and there are people who are not suitable for socializing with many people. So don't try to get along with a lot of people, but think optimistically, "I wish I had one friend who can forgive me." I think that it is best if it is possible to take care of the person, and to associate peacefully!
4. Keep a reasonable sense of distance from your neighbors
It is easy to have a troublesome image when it is heard that it is a neighborhood association. However, by knowing each other well, you can become a "reassuring companion" and help each other in the event of a disaster or accident when you are in trouble in your daily life. There is also the advantage of being able to spread knowledge because it is in contact with people of various ages.
Maintain a reasonable sense of distance
If you stop working with your neighbors, you will become isolated and not familiar with local information. On the other hand, if you get too close, you may become stifled and develop into emotional trouble. Let's maintain a reasonable sense of distance that is comfortable to each other.
Greetings and worries are important.
In the sense of recognizing each other's existence, let's naturally hang daily greetings such as "Hello" and "welcome home". You can live comfortably just by keeping in mind. When you take the elevator, you take the initiative in opening and closing the door button, and the extent to which you can worry about it will make your relationships smoother.
Refrain from the private talk.
When the distance is close and each other's family becomes acquainted, it is easy to talk about private things inadvertently. It is OK if it flows easily even if the household budget and marital relations are asked. Let's respond to the neighbors who like to talk with each other and parrot return. Our motto is "My House Is My House"!
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If you live every day, you will put yourself in a variety of group life, such as company and mom relationships, friendships, neighborhood relationships, etc. I ...