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Why doesn't the life of the "child in the middle" snap?

Whydoesn'tthelifeofthe"childinthemiddle"snap?

He is not an excellent student, but he is not an inferior student. Such a "medium-sized child" is easy to be left alone in the school. Rinko Torii, an educational advisor, said, "The 'child in the middle' has a lack of presence and is not required for opinions. Therefore, there is a risk of becoming an adult who can't be decided and can't move."

The child of "Inside" who is left "We are transparent existence"

For many years, the author has been covering private junior high and high schools mainly in the Tokyo metropolitan area. I have a lot of opportunities to listen to the live voices of not only teachers but also students, but recently I have noticed that there is.

Because the coverage destination is an integrated junior high and high school, the majority of the students who have entered the junior high school entrance examination are the majority. Among them, there are many students who are worried that they are not satisfied with their school life, regardless of the difficulty of passing the exam. Many of the students who have these problems are "middle" students in terms of grades.

One third-year junior high school student whose grade is "middle", said:

"At the end of the day, I'm transparent from the teachers' point of view. It's transparent, even if it's not noticed.

As for what it means, the teacher leaves them because there is no problem because the schoolwork and the friendship are taken. As a result, the existence that it is neither good nor bad is regarded as existence only to pay the tuition fee without expectation and concern as a result.

Middle-grade high school students don't have confidence in themselves.

The misfortune of the "inside" layer.... There is a testimony which supports this, too. It is a story that the professor of the private university in Tokyo which shows the position of the middle class a little lower by the university deviation value talked as "the problem of the present education".

"In my seminar, it's important to let students express their opinions. However, it is not easy to say the opinion at first. Most of the children who come into our house have achieved grades in middle school, but they can't deal with the fact that they should suddenly announce what they're thinking because they've never spoken their opinions in front of third parties."

In addition, the professor taught me:

"They never have an opinion, but rather vice versa. As proof of this, the seminar students say: "Teacher, can I say my opinion too?"　Until now, no adult ever listened so seriously to his story. In other words, they didn't claim it in their lives, but they didn't come across "adults" who silently listened to them. Their claims and opinions often sparkle. I think the "sins" of adults who have silenced them so far are now exposed in many places."

This is a remark in the coverage theme of "the problem of the present junior high and high school education seen from the university".

"Life satisfaction" falls when "desire for approval" is not satisfied

The author also agrees with this point that "the child in the inside is dangerous". People are creatures with a desire for approval, but if the desire is not satisfied, the satisfaction of life will fall extremely.

Adolescence, in particular, tends to be mentally unstable, but they are waiting for a third party's affirmation that you deserve to exist. In other words, instead of "I want you to be relieved", first of all, "I want you to listen to the story".

However, there are a lot of children who did not have the opinion seriously heard by the adult at this sensitive time. And, the children who are tired of waiting before long become adults with a lack of a sense of self-affirmation.

As a result, as pointed out in the previous article in this column describing "LINE and youth circumstances", many of them read too much air and act in an act that unconditionally panders to the opinions of someone who dominates the place. As a result, they tend to become like this when this becomes "habit".

"Lose the freedom to have your own opinion"

In the old society, it was still able to live enough. No, the work ant which made "Destruction private dedication" my mission, did not think anything, and was faithful to the order above would have been welcomed rather. However, society is changing at a tremendous speed, and it is not possible to cope with conventional common sense. What is required in an era where there is no right answer is the strength to think with your own head, make your own decisions, and act.

The child who did not stand out while in school was able to pass the super difficult university.

Then, how can such power be obtained?

The author is talking to the graduates who were called "Miracle-kun" at various schools. Miracle-kun is a former student who entered a super-difficult university or fulfilled his dream as a result, even though he didn't stand out while he was still in school. When I arranged these episodes from the teachers at each school, I found that Miracle had something in common.

It is sure to be "blessed with a friend and a teacher".

Almost 100% of junior high and high school students say they have high school satisfaction, and they say they had good friends. This is what happens when you dig deep into the word "good".

"There is a child who can talk about anything."

"I can't put my mind down."

"When I'm worried, they'll just be there for me."

And, it is testified that "the teacher is good". Let me give you an example of a student who has been blessed with good friends and teachers.

The background behind the unmotivated "middle child" was able to "pass the difficult medical school"

It is a "very ordinary male student" who went to a school in Kanagawa Prefecture. If you ask, club activities were the return club, study was a typical "inside" that there is no problem in advancement, and it looks back on oneself. However, it is said that this happened when the children around him became a high school student and entered the university entrance examination system.

"I didn't have much desire for regular tests until I was 2 years high. I couldn't feel positive about my studies. However, the moment my friends, who were good friends as a game mate, became high school students, I changed the color of my eyes and began to study. They were people in the advanced class, but while hanging out with them, they came to teach me parts that they didn't understand, and I was drunk by the waves. That's why I started to study."

After all, it passed the national university medical school of the super difficult of the first choice university after the ronin.

"I realized that the word "exam is a group game" was ingrained in my body. Until then, I was a person who didn't even know the meaning of effort, but I asked my friends, 'Why should I study?' I did a lot of stories like that. And the conclusion came out was 'to live my life'. So I thought there was a need to take the exam, so I started studying."

He told me why he became another "trigger".

"My high school teacher has always been the same teacher. The teacher just listened to me and my friend in the classroom after school. I was not motivated to study, and even for me who had a game, the teacher always said, 'You can do it if you do it.' He didn't abandon us. That's what gave me a chance to study."